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Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

Good morning. Let Monday be a doorway, not a judgment. Step through with gratitude, discipline, and a hopeful mindset today.

@Blurtitoutorg

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I don't have a microwave oven, but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks shit.

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When I was a boy, I laid in my twin-sized bed and wondered where my brother was.

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I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like "Dude, you have to wait."

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I used to be a hot-tar roofer. Yeah, I remember that... day.

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I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

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Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day.

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I like an escalator, man. Because an escalator cannot break. It just becomes stairs.

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If you are flammable and have legs you are never blocking a fire exit.

Mitch Hedberg

People on the 14th floor, you know what floor you’re really on.

Mitch Hedberg

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

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I like Kit-Kat, unless I'm with four or more people.

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I had one anchovy, that's why I didn't have two anchovies.

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A fly was very close to being called a "land," cause that's what they do half the time.

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I'm an ice sculptor - last night I made a cube.

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I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

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I saw a human pyramid once. It was very unnecessary.

Mitch Hedberg

A burrito is a sleeping bag for ground beef.

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A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

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My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

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A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

Mitch Hedberg

I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

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We all have self-doubt. You don’t deny it, but you also don’t capitulate to it. You embrace it.

Kobe Bryant

It’s a constant quest to try to be better today than you were yesterday.

Kobe Bryant

the moment you give up is the moment you let someone else win.

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May you always remember to enjoy the road, especially when it’s a hard one.

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Some people, after all, enjoy looking at a watch; others are happier figuring out how the watch works.

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Rest at the end, not in the middle

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The only aspect that can’t change, though, is that obsession.

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I draw from the crowd a lot.

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I like playing for the purple and gold. This is where I want to finish up.

Kobe Bryant

The only thing I'm afraid of is bees. I don't like bees. I'm allergic to them.

Kobe Bryant

What people see on court is another side of me; it's not me.

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I'm reflective only in the sense that I learn to move forward. I reflect with a purpose.

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I don't want to be the next Michael Jordan, I only want to be Kobe Bryant.

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Everyone looks at your watch and it represents who you are, your values and your personal style.

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It's hard for me to grasp the concept of somebody being nervous when I'm talking to them.

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People just don't understand how obsessed I am with winning.

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Winning takes precedence over all. There's no gray area. No almosts.

Kobe Bryant

These young guys are playing checkers. I'm out there playing chess.

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Dropkick Murphys get me going, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Nirvana... plus, all the regular hip-hop stuff.

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Magic has five championships. I have five championships. I'm pretty sure we both know what we're doing.

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Basketball is the seed of my muse.

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You could say I dared people to be their best selves.

Kobe Bryant

That’s what leads to introspection and that’s what leads to improvement.

Kobe Bryant

I liked challenging people and making them uncomfortable.

Kobe Bryant

What a journey this has been.

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Twenty-four years later, I pass my muse.

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My killer instinct to score was born.

Kobe Bryant

It became an obsession.

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I CAN DO THIS.

Kobe Bryant

@Blurtitoutorg

@Blurtitoutorg

@Blurtitoutorg

@Blurtitoutorg

@Blurtitoutorg

@Blurtitoutorg

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