To our Carers and Supporters, thank you for caring for us and supporting us. We know that it can sometimes take its toll. It can be hard for us to know how to thank you and mightn’t always say thank you enough.
Thank you for all of the practical help and support you offer us. For driving us to appointments, helping us to manage our home, cooking for us, collecting our prescriptions, helping us with the forms we’ve had to fill in and making appointments for us on days when giving up seems preferable to navigating the GP-appointment-booking-system. Thank you for encouraging us out of the house (however much we’ve resisted). When there are things that we’ve been stubbornly ignoring, such as the state of our bank account, you’ve faced up to it with us; thank you for helping, not judging.
Depression often tells us that we don’t deserve to have people around us, or that we’re a burden on others. We often feel as though we don’t deserve you. Sometimes we try to push you away because we don’t want to hurt you; we don’t want depression to reach out and grab you, too. This might feel like a personal attack. It might be confusing and not make any sense. We’re sorry for the times we’ve said or done hurtful things.
You’ve coped with the times when we’ve wildly alternated between eating almost nothing and emptying the fridge. Put up with the frustration and anger that spilled out of us. Hung out with us even though we’ve not showered in a while. Spent evenings with us despite how often we’ve nodded off by 6pm. Talked everything through with us at times when we’ve wanted to engage with an addiction. No matter what symptoms have appeared, you’ve stood by us.
Thank you for putting up with our sleepless nights. For staying up until 2am to make sure that we fall asleep safely, whether over the phone or in person. Thank you for sharing your house, your room, or your bed with us. Night-time can be incredibly lonely and sometimes it feels like we’re the only person in the world. Having you by our side reminds us that we’re not alone and people care. That can be all we need to quieten our mind, allow us to get some sleep, and carry us through to the morning safely.
All of our tearful messiness, snottiness, and grottiness haven’t sent you running. Thank you for letting us cry on your shoulder, offering us a tissue, encouraging us to wash our face, sitting next to us when we have no words and understanding that though we have no words, we need someone by our side.
Being at the end of the phone often makes more of an impact than you know. Thank you for staying on the phone in silence when we’ve had no words but needed to know that we weren’t alone. For the reassuring and motivating texts, the smile-inducing GIFs, and the ‘this reminded me of you’ moments. Thank you for ringing or texting to check in with us if you haven’t heard from us in a while. It means a lot to know that someone notices our disappearance.
Thank you for taking the time to learn about our illness. For being honest and telling us when something doesn’t make sense to you. But equally, for trying your best to understand the things we tell you.
We really appreciate your efforts in helping us to find some support. Thank you for researching things that might help us. It can be so tricky to find out what’s available to us both locally and nationally and to navigate different services and systems. It’s made a lot more difficult by our depression-brain. Your support with it helps to make accessing support feel more doable.
You’ve never stopped seeing the person we are beyond our illness. Depression can envelop our entire person and leave us feeling like a walking black cloud. You’ve never forgotten who we are underneath all of that and helped us to retain our identity. We can’t explain to you how much that means to us.
Developing new interests and becoming part of different communities has been a huge part of our recovery. We’re so grateful to you for encouraging our new hobbies (even those that seemed a little unusual!). The help in finding different groups and activities in our area has given us a push to leave the house when needed. We appreciate you accompanying us to the first few sessions of a new group or class… even if they haven’t been your thing.
Thank you for holding our hope at times when we had none. We know it must have been hard for you to weather the storms of crisis with us. It must have been awful to see us so low and to hear the thoughts in our head. Thank you for understanding that those thoughts were the illness, not us. Holding our hope encouraged us to keep fighting.
You know when to push and when to hold back. You’ve challenged us to do things we didn’t think were possible and have cheered us on the whole way. Thank you for being our biggest cheerleader. For waving those pom-poms. Sending postcards. Texting us GIFs. Tagging us in posts. Encouraging us, bigging us up, shouting from the rooftops about our progress and achievements and never ever ever giving up on us.
Thank you for all of this and so much more. We are so grateful.
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