A Letter To You, For When Life Feels Pointless

Dear You,

We know that life feels pointless right now. We understand how monotonous everything can become. What it’s like to feel totally and utterly worn down by trying to stay afloat. It can grind us down until we have no energy left at all. Until we begin to wonder what the point of it all really is.

A Letter To You, For When Life Feels Pointless

We see you. We see how hard you are working to hold things together. How keeping things ticking over is a superhuman achievement right now. Perhaps you don’t always manage to wear a clean jumper, or even get dressed every day. But you’re doing your best. You’re trying your best to take the medication you’ve been prescribed, keep the house running, look after any dependants, manage your money, and maybe, on a good day, wave a damp cloth around the kitchen.

Life can grind us down. When we’re really low, it can be difficult to find any meaning in our life. We often search for reasons to live. Reasons to keep going with everything when it’s so exhausting. A glimmer of hope on the horizon that offers us a reason to keep pouring energy into the daily grind. It can be so difficult to find this meaning, especially when we feel rubbish. Without meaning, everything can feel pointless. ‘Keeping things going’ becomes even harder when we can’t see the point in it.

Even though it feels pointless – we’re still doing it.  The fact that we’re still waking up each morning and trying to face the day in the best way we know how shows how tenacious we are.

When life feels pointless, and we’re struggling to find any meaning in the things we’re doing or to think of any reasons to live, suicidal thoughts can become louder. They can spring up and cloud our mind, using our lack of reasons to live, and lack of meaning, as ‘evidence’. When this happens, and we can’t find any hope, it can help to reach out to a friend, family member, or professional, for some support.

We’re allowed to cry, to scream, to get upset, and to feel frustrated at how unfair all of this is. We are allowed to ‘feel’ full stop. We’re allowed to take up space to ask for hugs, to ask for the support that we need, and to respond to our needs. We deserve support. We’re important, our life is important, and we deserve to feel safe.

Unfortunately, there isn’t a magic meaning-finding formula. There are times when no matter how hard we try life continues to feel pointless. Sometimes we just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other until we’re able to find some meaning again.

Sometimes when life feels pointless, it’s because we feel stuck. We know that we’re not where we want to be in life but might not know what it is we do want, or how to get there. Life can feel pointless because we’re putting all of our time and energy into things that aren’t fulfilling us, so we feel empty. At times like these, it can be helpful to brainstorm loads of different options – even if it’s blue-sky thinking and the things we come up with feel totally out of our reach. We could try changing something – even if it’s something really small like what we have for breakfast. Making little changes can shake things up and can help to re-ignite the ideas part of our brain. Perhaps we could try something new – giving things a go could lead to us find a passion for something that we’d never even thought about before.

We need to cut ourselves some slack. We are not pointless, and our life is not pointless. Our unrealistic expectations of ourselves can leave us feeling useless, and pointless because we never feel as though we’re enough. The contributions we make to society feel pointless because other people have contributed more. But other’s contributions do not invalidate our contributions. Other people’s achievements don’t invalidate our own achievements. We are enough. Our life is not pointless.

If you are feeling as though life is pointless right now, we’re not expecting you to get out of bed and run a marathon. We hear you. We’re standing alongside you. We hope that you’re able to do a little bit of self-care. We hope that you can think back to all of the times that you’ve coped with hard stuff before and that you recognise how strong you are. We hope that you feel able to keep putting one foot in front of the other for another day and that you’re able to reach out for the support you need.

Lots of love,

The Blurt Team x

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